Yes, I am aware I have written a previous blog about letting go; however, this topic comes up for me a lot. We all like to hang onto things and carry them around for much longer than needed. Letting go isn’t an easy thing to do. I personally struggled to let go of so much. I struggled to open up my life to admit I am not perfect. I am using my struggles, my failures, and my lessons learned to inspire others. It’s okay to talk about these things.
The top two pieces of advice I always give people is that communication is key. You can’t change anything without communication. You can’t change yourself without talking to yourself. You can’t end a disagreement by not saying anything at all. Now don’t get me wrong, that doesn’t mean showing up at a disagreement ready to fight. Communication should be calm. If you cannot remain calm take some time and calm down. No one can read your mind. No one can figure you out if you don’t talk about it. Nothing can be fixed if you don’t open up and use your words. Kind composed words.
The second is always let that shit go. You can’t forever be carrying your shit around with you, it gets heavy. It causes us unwanted stress and it causes us to be unwell. You must let go, free yourself, and move forward.
Why am I sharing this information with you? I am sharing this information with you because believe it or not I was once a horrible communicator and I held onto things for way longer than I needed. By horrible communicator I mean I either didn’t talk about it or I blew up in anger and yelled. Sure, it made me feel great in the moment but overall, it made me depressed and overthink how I reacted. I spent a lot of time saying sorry after the fact instead of using kind composed words. There is no need for cruel or hateful words. Choose your words wisely, you cannot take them back.
I grew up with two vastly unique styles of parents. Nothing against my parents, we all just do the best we can and hope it’s enough for our children. Life doesn’t come with a how-to manual! No judgment. I fully admit I struggled with communicating with my son calmly. I was a loud-voiced yeller. This kid knows how to push my buttons. This mini version of me can be downright annoying! I admit we struggled, and I ended up reaching out for some help. Asking for help felt like I failed as a parent. I didn’t want it to just be my son who worked on things. I also knew I needed to change. We signed up for a program to help us both and our relationship has never been better. Something we both didn’t want to do at first became one of the best experiences we had. We met some utterly amazing people throughout our journey. This program we did I have recommended to many other people. We went in with an open mind and were impressed by the progress and help we received.
Sometimes we all need a little help. I am not perfect. I am always learning how to be a better communicator. I am always learning how to be my best self. Asking for help shouldn’t be viewed as a failure, it should be viewed to empower yourself. Make today and each day you are given as memorable as you can. Life is too short to hold onto things we no longer need. Let that shit go!