Author: sascha

It’s 2022!

Happy new year friends and family! I would like to wish you the best year yet!

We have had 2 years of a weird ever-changing global pandemic. Not what I had envisioned for the years.

I thought for sure by 2022 I would have a flying car! Instead, I am trying to navigate and figure out the technological advances of my new laptop. It’s been more than 15years since I bought a new one. I rarely replace my computers or cellphones unless they stop working. I still prefer to write on paper but I am trying to get with the times. I bought a small sized laptop that I can throw in any bag. I am trying to navigate my thoughts into a word documents vs paper. I still think my ideas flow better when I write pen to paper but it’s a lot of work to then type it all out. Trying to manage my writing time better. I want to accomplish finishing my book!

What are you’re 2022 goals?

Who sets new years goals and who doesn’t believe in it?

I am one of those people who shockingly doesn’t believe in new years resolutions. I don’t think I have ever set one. Oh, wait no that’s not true one year in the early 2000’s I bought Billy Blanks Tae-Bo on DVD and was going to take a year’s worth of classes. I laugh as I type this because he kicked my butt to the point of pain and tears. I laid on my floor and wept. This caused me to give up very early on in this resolution. I might have to revisit these Tae-Bo classes and see if I could successfully complete one now. Billy you are one tough dude.

I no longer set a year goal. I think the concept is unrealistic. I think you should strive every day to be the best version of yourself. Instead of trying to change my year, I focus more on my smaller manageable daily goals. A few daily changes make my year outcome worth it without the pressure of a big goal and unnessesary tears. Small changes daily make for a better yearly outcome.

How do I do this? I start small. I try to incorporate some kind of fitness into my days. Some days I need to run off the feelings or to clear my mind other days I need to flow, stretch, slow and calm with yoga. Every day I need to move my body. I like my motto run thirty minutes and then write thirty minutes. The most important part of my day is taking some part of the day for myself. To do something I love to do. This keeps me positive. Self care and self love are always on the top of my to do list. Make time for yourself. Make yourself a priority.

Take each day and do your best. Be the best version of yourself each and every day. Think positive be positive.

Make 2022 your best year.

 

The Christmas season is my absolute favourtie time of the year despite the cold weather. My heart is always so full around the Christmas season. I cannot wait to see my friends and family. To light up the Christmas lights.

The season starts for me the minute I can find eggnog. This year I received a text from a dear friend who informed me she found it and I raced to the store. START THE CAR! This year many times in my search for eggnog stores have been sold out. I think people are catching on to my delicious treat.

My family growing up made Christmas the most magical experience. The most exciting memory for me wasn’t getting presents or even the delicious food it was finding the perfect tree.

I grew up in a small town and our local car was became a Christmas tree lover’s dream. I would wander through the rows and rows of trees with my dad sipping hot chocolate and somehow he convinced me I did it every year I found the perfect tree. We hauled it home and decorated it with all our homemade school ornaments. We would sit around with Christmas music playing, the fireplace roaring, and string popcorn garlands. I wanted this tradition to live on through my son. I wanted him to love our real Christmas tree as much as I did. I wanted to have all his kid-made ornaments proudly displayed. I wanted him to feel the same love and Christmas magic I did.

This year started off a tad rough I bought all new outdoor lights as the squirrels chewed them up before I could get them down in the spring. This year I strung the Christmas light across the house with frozen fingers and tired legs from the ladder climb only to have the squirrels chew them up the very next day. I only got to light them up once and I didn’t even get a picture.  Always have a backup plan. I took the lights off the roof and was able to rewire the strings to work. We light up the inside twice as bright. More lights on the tree than ever before.

When I moved out on my own my dad hauled out all the ornaments we made as kids and my brothers somehow survived but mine got eaten. My memories were eaten probably by squirrels. These little buggers are really messing with my positive Christmas vibes. I decided then to steal my brother’s prize cork horse ornament that’s survived some 35 years and looks new. It’s the first thing I hang at the top of the tree every year. It reminds me of all the years we had together decorating trees. I also send him a picture every year that I still have the prize ornament. I am that annoying little sister forever.

I buy a new ornament every year for my son and this year I think I found the ornament of all ornaments. I found a colour-changing hockey-themed singing Stomping Tom ball. I didn’t realize at the time it sang the whole song. I think I can now sing along to every word. I found my boyfriend a moose ornament. Every time he goes to Alaska he sees a moose. I went to Alaska with him never saw a single moose. I was so excited about their ornaments I forgot to get myself one. Good thing I have the cork horse.

My son knows the tradition first it starts with pouring eggnog, putting the fireplace channel on, cranking the Christmas music, covering the tree with lights, and then rushing to put the most ornaments on! I get teary-eyed every year with all the homemade ornaments and the ones that were given to us that hold such special memories. Every year we have the perfect family filled with love Christmas tree.

From our house to yours have a wonderful holiday season.

 

 

 

 

Do you have a favourite colour? A colour that instantly makes you happy?  What colour you are drawn to?

I love purple! I have painted the walls in my house purple. I have added glitter. I love shiny things. I want to purple glitter my whole house. Purple makes me feel a sense of calmness, comfort, and happiness. Most days I can be found wearing something purple. I wish my car was purple.

I googled what it means to love purple and I found this interesting bit: “What does purple say about your personality?”

“Being a personality colour purple, you have a peaceful and tranquil quality and a quiet dignity about you. People are drawn to your charismatic and alluring energy. … With your personality colour purple you inspire others with your creative thinking and your ability to deal positively with adversity.”

I am calmest when I am being creative. I love to colour. I can get lost in a creative picture. The shades of purple.

When I am upset, when I am overthinking, or when I need to calm down I sharpen up my pencil crayons. Somedays I wake up on the wrong side of the bed. Somedays I can’t get out of a funk. Splash of colour and I am good to go. Get lost in a colouring book. I find a picture that needs colour to come to life. I get lost in the creativity of making it come alive. I like a hard outline and shaded inner picture. The blending of colours. Colouring a different colour. Colouring outside of the lines. It is my picture to do what I want to with. It’s a time I can be creative. It takes my mind and my worries away.

As a kid, I loved those giant activity colouring books the pages never ended and the crayons had every colour. I love sharing these with my boy. The joy and excitement that crosses his fave when he finds a teddy bear or cat to colour.

As an adult, I can’t believe the colouring books you can get. Corgi colouring books, fancy swear word colouring books, Keanu Reeves colouring books. How could I not buy all of these?  I might have a slight obsession with colouring. I own a lot of fun colouring books. I buy a lot of colouring books as gifts. My friends and family can tell you they have coloured with me. I have shared a mix of laughter and tears over colouring pages. I have colouring pages on my vision wall. I love to be surrounded by colours.

I find calmness in colouring.

 

 

 

I was bundled up with so many layers. I had long johns, leggings, ski pants, and snow pants for the bottom layers. I had layers of socks and my winter boots on. I layered on the tops starting with a tank top, long sleeve warm layer, a big fluffy hoodie, and not 1 but 2  winter jackets. Even layers of hats and mittens. I felt like a little kid overdressed by a parent. I could hear my parents saying “make sure you are warm enough it’s going to be cold”.  I could barely move my arms or legs. I had purchased all new gear for this winter trip. I am a Canadian who dislikes being cold. I took a trip to Alaska in November, what was I thinking?

I was off in search of the mysterious northern lights. I wanted to ride a dog sled through a quiet snowy forest. Sit in a hot spring with frozen hair. Run through the snow in my winter boots and then my bikini what a fun vacation.

My Opa (grandpa) reported to me that he searched out the very same lights many years ago when he arrived in Canada. He told me they made him feel motion sickness and depressed. I share in his motion sickness on boats so I prayed that I didn’t share the same feeling when I gazed up at the lights.

I am beyond happy to report I have crossed this must-see event off my bucket list. I have dreamed for years of that exact moment. I didn’t think I would be standing on a mountain top in Alaska in November but this trip just came together. Things always have a way of working out for me. Focus on the positive and positive things will happen. How much my life has changed just from changing the way I think.

I took a tour to a mountain top in a little tank-like vehicle on a tour that almost guarantees you see the northern lights. As I stood on the mountain top with my boyfriend freezing I had tears frozen on my face yet my heart was so full. Beautiful sites always bring me to tears. Soon as we arrived on this mountain we started to witness shades of green appearing. The later the hours the more vibrant the colours became. Between 1 and 3 am seemed to host the best displays of colours. The light came alive and started to move and dance across the sky. I stood in awe. I tried to capture the beauty with my phone camera but the pictures do not capture even a tiny bit of the beauty in a front-row seat. I would agree with everyone who ever told me the northern lights are truly a sight you have to see.

Alaska has so much natural beauty. I have dreamed forever to catch a glimpse. My nose, toes, and fingertips were frozen but my bucket list became shorter and my heart is forever full.

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When I wrote dancing in the rain as a title for a blog I immediately had a rock star moment and started singing “If you like pina and gettin’ caught in the rain”. It instantly makes me giggle at how much I love dancing in the rain. I also do love a pina colada. Have I had a Pina Colada in the rain? Absolutely! The combination is perfect. Don’t believe me? Next time it rains get a pina colada and get out dancing in the rain.  Dancing in the rain is the one time when the world slows down and I feel like no one is watching me. I feel like the rain coming down around surrounds me like a blanket and no one can see me. I get lost in the feeling of being the only one in the world. I love that feeling.

Sometimes I invite my son or a friend to run out and enjoy dancing in the rain with me. It always ends the same way being soaked, feeling silly, and filled with laughter. You cant dance in the rain in be in a bad mood. It will instantly cheer you up. I imagine it has others giggling too. Anyone who witnesses that amount of silliness has to be giggling. Laughter makes us feel better. Being silly makes us forget about the seriousness in our lives.

For the record, I am not a dancer so the moves seen during the rain are not those of a professional. I almost never dance unless the rain brings out that feeling. For those few short minutes, nothing in the world matters it’s just pure silliness. You forget anything you were worried about. You get lots in your senses.

When I write a blog I have that same feeling as dancing in the rain brings. I write best on days when I am alone and my house is quiet. These are usually rainy days. On days when no one is watching. When no one can interrupt me. It is one of the few times my phone is turned off. I grab a pen and paper and the ideas just start flowing. I write like no one is reading. Sometimes my blog has a purpose or a message for someone and sometimes it’s just a story or something that has happened and I want to share. I just write the ideas as they come to me. I like to write from my heart. I like to share my experiences in hopes that it helps someone. I write hoping it changes and inspires you to think differently about life. Leave the negativity behind and embrace where positivity takes you.

Like my dancing, I am not a professional writer it is just a dream of mine that I have always wanted to pursue. I want to become someone’s favourite author.  In order to reach that goal, I show up weekly and write a blog. I believe these blogs keep my book dreams alive. Blogging keeps me writing. Blogging keeps me dreaming.

Shockingly I used to be shy and I did my best to avoid talking to anyone. I kept all my feelings silent. I went to therapy and never shared a word. I feared if I shared things about my trauma, my failures, or my rejections people would judge me or think of me differently. When did this change? When I started talking to people. When I opened up to share my stories and started hearing other people’s stories. It was then that I realized we all have trauma. We all have failures and we all have things we wish that we would have done differently. We are all doing the best that we know how to do.

Keep moving forward and never give up. Everything has a way of working out. There is a solution to whatever you are faced with. Pay attention to what life is teaching you. If things didn’t go as planned figure out the reason and a new solution. When you need help reach out. Life is easier when faced together.  Live with no judgments and an open positively kind heart.

I don’t know what happens to us when we are no longer here. Heaven or wherever you go when you pass on from here well it has some of my favourite people. Some of those people I have been missing like crazy. I often find signs from those who have passed on. You are always on my mind and forever in my heart.

Lately, I have been finding dimes. It is said that if you find dimes:

“Someone or something is trying to get your attention. – Guidance or validation that you’re on the right path. – Ancestors, spirits, or deceased loved ones want you to know they’re looking out for you.”

When I find a dime I always look up and smile. I feel like now more than ever in my life I am on the right path. Thanks for leaving me dimes.

I miss you like crazy and I know from wherever you are you are watching out for me.

My house has trinkets all over left to me by loved ones no longer with me. I have gorgeous paintings from my grandmother I can still envision her painting in her sunroom with the utmost look of pure joy as she smiled at what she was creating. I still sleep under quilts she made every stitch by hand.

The abstract Cadillac painting by Mr. Freak makes me smile every day. It’s the first thing you see in my house. The chair you designed sits perfectly on my deck looking out onto the water. It’s my favourite place to drink tea, read my books, and work on my book. You had a way of touching people with your kindness. My son still thinks you’re one of the coolest people.

Today however when I was struggling with what to write about I got a sign that made me laugh and cry. I opened a drawer looking for a document and out of the back of the drawer fell a card. It’s a super old “call me” card. You used to use them back in the day when calling long distance was expensive and not included in your calling plan. You had a card with a code that made the long-distance free. It says “Now you can talk to (name) more often”.

For years after you passed away, I carried this card with your name on it. I haven’t seen it in years and forgot they even existed. Now I am not sure if this is a sign I need to clean out this drawer or if you were just trying to get my attention but it worked. Pat wasn’t my father he was my best friend’s father but he accepted a lot of friends as family. He was a huge inspiration in my life and I miss him. What I wouldn’t do to be able to call you one more time and hear your voice, your laugher, and your sass.  Last year I took a caddy cruise up to your grave just to sit and chat. I brought a beer to sit and talk. I drank some and poured you some. I sat and chatted about all the things that have happened since you passed. I think that chat is what lead me to make the decisions that I have. I wish you could have met my son he would have had so much fun hanging out with you! I will forever keep your memory alive. Cherish all the times you made me smile and laugh. You were one of a kind and I am forever grateful for the time you were in my life.

Finding that call me card made me call a lot of people just to hear their voices. In a world of texting, I love the convince of shooting off a quick text but there is nothing like hearing your voice. I will forever be calling just to hear your voice.

If you could make one phone call who would you call?

At the other end of your leash, I am smiling. I am so grateful for all the dogs in my life.  From the ones I walk to the ones I have adopted as family, you all fill such a special place in my heart. My heart had a giant hole a sense that something was missing. That feeling has since been filled with the love of dogs. Without ever saying a word dogs show us and they teach us what it is like to feel unconditional love. I am beyond blessed for the dogs I have had in my life and the dogs I still get to experience. I wake up and kiss my dog every day and I kiss her when I come home too. You cant resist Kelso’s cute face.  I am forever thankful for how Kelso the corgi became a part of our family when we needed her the most she picked our family to join. My heart is so full.

The dogs pictured here are the ones who inspire me to keep walking from young to old they have ticked along the kilometers. They have motivated me to keep moving. To walk places I haven’t seen before. To venture where they want to go. To meet new people. To make new friends. Dogs have always taken me out of my comfort zone yet showed me it’s okay. Dogs have a way of keeping us safe.

Some days I can be found just walking and talking to the dogs clearing my thoughts. Some days I have my headphones in. I am currently listening to crime podcasts. Secretly my dream has always been to solve crimes. I have always had this passion to work for the wrongfully convicted that speaks directly to my soul. No matter how deep I am into a podcast I always lower my volume or take a headphone out to say hello to someone walking by or stop and chat. I have met some wonderful people around town. You never know how a smile and a simple hello can change someone’s day.

I love how different every dog I walk is. Each has their own personality and they keep me laughing. I get leashes tangled. I always have more poop bags than I can carry to the next trash can. I am sure anyone who sees us gets a chuckle too. I love the cute looks the dogs give me when they know I am struggling. On the days that start out or finish less than ideal I immediately know what will cheer me up. Get a dog and start walking. I walk until I feel like whatever was bothering me is gone. Sometimes I just need a quiet walk to gather my thoughts.

At the end of your leash, my heart is full and I am so grateful for every step you walk with me. Thank you sweet dogs for teaching me so many valuable lessons and inspiring my book. Here’s to many more years being at the other end of your leash.

 

I love thanksgiving.

My heart and my stomach are both so full. I am so thankful and blessed to be living the life I am. I give thanks not just on this day but every day.

Thanksgiving is the perfect time to review the year with positivity, love, gratitude and thankfulness for all that we have and all that we are working towards improving.

Always something to be thankful for! What do you give thanks for?

I spent the holiday weekend working at the hospital with some of my favourite co-workers. I got to give thanks to all the people who make my work a better place. The people who inspire me to keep doing a great job. Iam thankful for my job.

I am thankful this weekend’s weather was that of summer temperatures. The sun was shining and the leaves are now changing colours. So many beautiful shades of red and orange making an appearance. It’s slowly easing into fall, such a beautiful time of year.

I am thankful that my grandparents made a turkey dinner and my family came together to enjoy a delicious meal. I can always count on my Granny to make the perfect turkey. I love turkey, throw in some fixings and I am the happiest of any meal all year! My Opa (grandfather) loves when his family comes together for a meal. He sits at the head of the table in a seat he has more than earned with the biggest smile on his face. I look around from the other end of the table at the crazy bunch of nuts I call my family and even though we have all had our moments like any family I love this crew like no other. We shared great food, stories, and tons of laughter. I am brought to tears with how full I am. How thankful I am.

My phone was flooded with messages from family a far and friends everywhere. My face hurt from smiling so much. I am feeling the love and I love you all so very much!

Giving thanks for each and everyday I have with you all.

Don’t wait for Thanksgiving give thanks everyday!

 

The biggest lesson I learned during my journey of self-discovery was that I built some tall walls around myself to protect my feelings. I was scared to show others how I felt. I have felt embarrassed about where my life has been. Clearly my life hasn’t gone as I had planned.

I only wanted people to see the good and successful parts of my life. The parts that looked like they were all rainbows and sunshine. The success and happiness. Only at the time, I didn’t have any of that. I didn’t want others to see the stormy parts. The failures that caused doom and gloom. Then I couldn’t see the good parts that failing brought me. Embrace failure. Failing has brought some of the greatest opportunities into my life. Failure isn’t the end it’s just the beginning of the journey. If you fail get back up and try it again, try it differently, or try something completely different.

Life is what you make it. You are always capable of change. You are never too old, too broke, or too damaged to make a change.  Just like adding a brick to the wall, you are also capable of removing a brick. I didn’t build tall walls in a day. Every failure I added on another brick. Every time someone was unkind to me I added on another brick. What I didn’t do was remove a brick every time I succeeded or every time someone was kind to me. In my darkness, I just kept piling bricks until my walls were taller than me. Those were some tall walls.  My walls were so tall my whole world became black. Walls so tall I could no longer see a way out. Walls so tall I could not allow anyone in. I stayed distant, alone, and stuck in my own darkness. Let me tell you the wall of darkness lead me to complete sadness mixed with depression.

When I could no longer cope with my tall walls I started to analyze how each brick came to be a part of my wall and my life? What did I have to do in order to remove the brick? I wanted to smash these bricks for good. I didn’t want to tear my walls down only to find myself putting each brick back up on the wall. That is an exhausting process.  As much as I would love to tell you I took a wrecking ball to my walls and smashed all my problems away. I didn’t. I think a lot of us want a quick fix but few of us are willing to put in the hard work. It has taken me years to remove my bricks and destroy my walls.

I spent years discovering my failures, looking over my wrongdoings, my unrealistic expectations of others. I had to accept that I am not in charge of the world. I had to learn how to stand up for myself. I had to review the people in my life and figure out if they had a positive or negative effect. Removing bricks and letting people know the real me feels amazing because I know I am being true to myself. I am sharing my story from darkness to light to inspire others to share in their struggles.  You are not alone. Everyone has walls. What’s holding your wall up? What thoughts and expectations do you need to destroy? I want to help you live a life free from feeling trapped inside tall walls. Let’s knock em down brick by brick you can do it!

Two things I love in life are practicing yoga and enjoying puppy cuddles. I  love basking in all the silliness-happiness that puppies bring.

I didn’t know puppy yoga was a thing but I am sure glad I had the opportunity to experience it. Not only did I get to partake in this yoga event but the puppies that came were corgis. Corgi puppies are my weakness. They are too cute for words. I couldn’t sleep the night before I was beyond excited. I printed my ticket and I was ready to go. Take my money! Start the car!

The yoga class was held at Whozagooddog canine enrichment center. If you have a dog you need to check out this place. It has everything your dog could ever dream of! Great place to tire your dog out in many of the activity rooms, fitness, training,  grab a treat, or even some raw dog food,  and they have full grooming services. Your dog will leave looking top-notch show-worthy! This is the location where Kingston Ontario corgis have hosted corgi parties!. We hope we can do this again soon. All of the cool dogs go to Whozagooddog. Being a part of this dog community has brought so many great dog people into my life. I love following Whozagooddog on Facebook and Instagram because they post pictures every day of the happy dogs attending doggie daycare. If you don’t follow them I suggest you do its an instant mood booster. You won’t be able to stop smiling at all the cute dogs.  Thank you Whoozagooddog for all you do keep up the amazing work! Can’t wait to see you again soon.

The eleven puppies that came to puppy yoga were from Edgebrook Kennels. If you are considering a Cardigan corgi I would highly recommend checking out this kennel.

As I sat on my yoga mat listening to our lovely instructor telling us what puppy yoga would be like I couldn’t help but feel the positive energy flowing. Everyone was sitting on their yoga mats with huge smiles anxiously awaiting the puppies. Then as the class started and we all began to hold our first yoga pose the puppies came running down the hall and burst into the room. They made their grand entrance memorable. Eight-week-old corgi puppies you can’t resist those little fluffy butts. The whole room let out an “aw” as the puppies quickly ran around filling the room with laughter. I don’t know that I ever held a full yoga pose. I would start a pose and then a new puppy would come to say hello. I can’t resist those cute puppies I had to snuggle them all. At the beginning of the class, the puppies were so full of energy and by the end, we had a huge pile of sleeping cuties. They put on a lot of kilometers on those little legs making the rounds to meet everyone. My heart is still so full from this event. Thank you for having me and I look forward to doing this again.