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Growing

I have a confession before I start this blog. I kill plants. Yes, it’s true. I don’t mean to be a plant serial killer it just happens. For the record, this is not on purpose. I don’t buy plants to kill them; it’s not a fun hobby of mine. I would love to have my house covered in plants. I would love to grow big beautiful palm-type trees and to have flowers in every colour. Sadly I have none. My last victim was an aloe plant. Rest in peace, my little friend.

It doesn’t seem to matter if it’s a flower, tree, bush, or house plant I seem to kill them all. I have been trying to grow something, anything, without much luck. I have dreamed of my house being covered in greens. Every plant I have tried to keep has perished rather quickly. I can’t take all the credit for killing the plants I do have a cat that gets into all the plants. He enjoys digging up plants as well as eating them. Thanks, Noah for being so helpful.

Valentine’s day 2021 was the first time in forever I can remember not receiving any flowers from a loved one. Hold up don’t worry Valentine’s Day was saved thanks to a kind strange man. I came home with a beautiful bouquet of flowers. This kind guy decided to buy a truckload of flowers and hand them out. The world needs more kind strangers like that guy. Thanks, James.

I am not a huge fan of cut flowers they never last long and it’s kinda sad when they die, but for the time they are in full bloom, the beautiful colours and scents delight me. Every year for as long as I can remember my Opa (grandfather) has bought me more flowers than anyone I know.

I have never seen such beautiful bouquets of flowers as the ones arranged at our local store here. Trugs Floral’s flower arrangements are exceptional. I love where I live.

The house I purchased some years back came with amazing flower gardens. The lady who lived here had the most beautiful gardens. I could tell she took such pride. I am trying. I find it hard to find the time to spend in the flower beds. I buy new soil every year and mulch and I feel like I spend way more time than necessary. Yet everything keeps dying.
I am trying. My plants and flowers are a process. I am not giving up. I am determined. I have joined plant growing groups. I have reached out to people with beautiful plants for tips and tricks. I am designing a yoga corner in my house that will hopefully include hanging plants, ones that I can keep alive.

Life is a work in progress and not everything I have tried has bloomed into something great but I never give up. It seems simple to some but it has been a real struggle for me. Hit me up if you have some plant tricks or tips. For those of you living locally if you love gardening swing by in the spring I could use all the help I can get.

This is my year. I am going to successfully grow a house plant or two and I am going to get my outside flower beds looking like the year I moved in. Stay tuned for the updated plants I grew and or kept alive in the spring forward blog!

Growing is one of the most important life lessons. Never stop growing. Always have dreams and goals to work towards even it’s something simple as successfully keeping a house plant alive. I never stop growing. I fail. I get up and I keep trying. Every dead plant or failure has taught me something to try differently. I try again. I will not give up until I have beautiful plants. I have that drive and determination about any obstacle in life. Find positivity, keep moving forward and grow.

Dreaming

Recently while sitting down by the lake in a ray of sunshine I made a bucket list of 100 things that I want to do. Sitting down by the lake is where I do a lot of my writing and dreaming. I wrote out a list of 100 things I want to do as well as places I wanna see. I encourage you to make a list too. I had a ton of fun dreaming of so many things. I need to keep the dreams alive. Wintertime blues got me feeling like I wanna stay in bed, under my heated blanket forever! Covid got me feeling like I wanna stay home without a mask on. Ah, home the place where it’s acceptable to be in Pj’s and un-masked.

One place I have always dreamed of going to is the Cadillac Ranch in Amarillo Texas. This has been my dream for years. The Cadillac Ranch has 10 Cadillacs buried nose-first into the ground that you can spray paint. It truly is a beautiful piece of artwork. One I must see for myself. My dad went to this beautiful location without out me. Yes, I still talk to him despite how mad I am he lived my dream without me. He didn’t even bring me back a t-shirt. He did however take some cool pictures. I have to add a picture of the Cadillac Ranch to my vision board. I haven’t traveled much of the U.S.A but Amarillo is one of my dreams. A must see! Cadillacs and a Texas-sized steak and this girl would be happier than ever!

Another place I dream of one day seeing is the Yukon and Alaska. I watch a lot of shows based in these areas and I know it doesn’t do it justice but it’s something I have to see. I have a need to see the Northern Lights. My parents met in the Yukon many moons ago. The stories that have shared made me dream more of seeing the great white north. My son was supposed to be hiking the Chilkoot Trail last summer but due to travel restrictions, it’s on hold. I hope like his grandma before him he hikes it and takes millions of pictures.

My ultimate Yukon/Alaskan dream is to get on the back of a dog sled. To have a team of dogs run me through the wilderness in complete silence taking in the sights. That to me would be paradise. I need to experience this. I dream of dog sledding. I recently heard a quote about what it’s like to be on a dog sled and I loved it.

“On the back of a dog sled is as close as it gets to a magic carpet ride.”

Who doesn’t wanna go on a magic carpet ride? The closest thing I ever got to a magic carpet ride was probably those crazy carpet sleds we had as kids.

I have never owned a sled dog. I think it would take a lot of corgis to pull me in a sled! What an adorable team of corgis it would be though.

Recently I started walking my friends Husky and I realized the strength of pull this girl has and how she can walk forever. I cannot tire this dog out. I have enjoyed how long and how fast this dog walks. She keeps me running and laughing. She has helped me get over my winter blues more than anyone. I cannot imagine if one husky can pull that much how fast we would speed through the wildness with a team. I need to experience this! Yes, clearly I have thought about stealing this dog, only one problem, no scratch that we have a couple of problems with this plan. First, off I have Kelso the corgi who is a super grumpy old corgi who bit and ripped the nose off this husky when she was a puppy, and my friend has keys to my house! I would have to steal her and bolt north to start my dog sled team!

I cannot wait to be able to travel again. I have so many places and faces I want to see.

In the meantime, I will be around town walking dogs down by the lake forever dreaming and writing.

What’s one place you have always dreamed of seeing? What’s one thing you have always dreamed of doing?

Make a bucket list of 100 things. I had such fun dreaming of all the things I want to do! Cure your winter blues with dreams.

S.A.D

Does January have you feeling down?

Do you feel like all your energy is drained?

Where is the sun? The fun?

Every year I find myself struggling to survive the month of January. It’s a new year and I always set a new intention or theme I want to work on for the year. New Year still the same great me just always working to tweak a few things.
January is filled with some of the best people and pets I know birthdays for that I am grateful! Dan, Kelso, Granny and cousin Dahri you help me survive January. I love a birthday. I love decorating. I love cake!

Truth be told I had never heard of S.A.D I just thought once winter went on for too long I was over it. I like the sun and the heat. The long summer days where you think it’s 5 pm but it’s 9 pm. After a few months, the darkness and the cold of the winter get to me. I can feel myself wanting to just stay in bed forever. I dislike being cold. I do get a lot of relaxing, tea drinking, and book reading done in the winter months. I absolutely love when it snows and you look out the window or door to a beautiful untouched winter scene. The big fluffy snowflakes slowly dancing to the ground is a sight I love to watch.

It was a friend of mine who first told me about S.A.D.

If you google SAD you will find “Seasonal affective disorder (SAD) is a type of depression that’s related to changes in seasons — SAD begins and ends at about the same times every year. If you’re like most people with SAD, your symptoms start in the fall and continue into the winter months; sapping your energy and making you feel moody”
Does anyone feel like this?

Lately, I have been having some rough days. Today I took a day to disconnect from most people on social media. I put my phone down something I don’t do often enough. I went for a walk all alone this morning. I jumped out of bed and made myself get outside. I came home had tea and then I went back outside with my dog. I took Kelso for a walk down the park to see the swans. This year the swans have been wild. The swans have been motivating me to walk more. I have enjoyed sitting down by the lake and take some of the most amazing pictures.

Today my son got to go back to school and he came home in a wonderful mood. He struggled with homeschooling and was so thankful to be back with friends. We turned out Munday feelings into the best Monday ever!

We had a wonderful supper followed by some yoga relaxation that even Kelso got in on. Our dog does an amazing down dog and when you’re trying to do relaxation she will pile her toys on you. We laughed and we had a wonderful day.

When I am feeling like S.A.D is getting to me I need to remember to breathe. This feeling like all other feelings will pass. I need to get outside and enjoy what nature has to offer. I need to disconnect from technology. I need to do yoga with the crazy members of my house. I need to sit down and in five minutes I thought of all the people and things I am grateful for and it brought me to tears.

What’s something you have done this month that was just for you? That brought you back to feeling like yourself?

Don’t let the long winter months get to you. If you need someone to talk to my phone is always on.

I made it through the day.

I have been dreading January 16th, 2021 for three hundred and sixty-five days. I will forever remember January 16th, 2020 as one of the hardest days of my life.

This date forever holds a huge place in my heart. January 16th, 2012 is the day you were born and exactly eight years later it also marks the day you passed away. Charleston you were my heart dog. You were my first taste at owning a corgi. You are the dog that forever changed my life.

I admit I used to think people who shared stories of animals who saved their lives were a bit wacky. Of course, that was until it happened to me. Until I experience the unconditional love of an animal. Don’t get me wrong I have had many wonderful pets over the years but none of them spoke to my soul as this dog did. I get it now. The power of animals is amazing.

For seven years in a row, I put on your party hat and celebrated your birthday like the crazy corgi lady I am.

I spent an entire year tearing up at the sight of your pictures. I spent the entire year missing the sound of your dog tags jingling on your collar when you strutted around like you owned this house. I spent the entire year missing you and wishing you were still here.

I survived the first twenty-four hours after you were gone in sweat pants covered in your unbelievably thick endless shedding corgi glitter. I refused to vacuum because all of you would be gone. Little did I know you had a plan in the works? I know your looking down having a good laugh at our current situation.

I swore I would never have another dog in my lifetime. I was going to treasure the memories you left me with. I felt no dog could ever compare to you and that no dog could ever fill the hole that was left in my heart. No dog would ever get me as you got me. You just knew my soul. You were my perfect dog. My heart dog.

This year on January 16th I wiped the tears from my eyes and we celebrated what would have been your 9th birthday, which we now celebrate with Queen Kelso. I started in October trying to get her to rock a party hat. I knew she would be a challenge. She is kind of an old lady set in her ways. A real party pooper. On the first attempt, she bit me and drew blood. Not a fan of party hats I see. I was determined to get this birthday picture. The new game plan was to motivate her with dog treats and cheese until she realized party hats cannot harm corgis. Little hard work and a bit of blood loss and ta-da we did it. We tried to sing Happy Birthday to Kelso. Dear Kelso, I don’t know if it’s that you just don’t like that song or my singing in general but your barking in my face was received loud and clear. More treats less singing.

I believe in timing and I think Kelso came into our lives at the perfect time. She helped us survive the wild ever-changing wild world of 2020. She keeps my son and me laughing until it hurts. She has been nickname by my niece and trained to come when you call her “old donkey legs.” She takes fetch as the most serious task in the world. She reminds me every day of you Charlie in looks and attitude. I know you put her in our path to heal our hearts. Thank you, Charlie!

Here’s to many more years with corgis in party hats.

Eight

Where have the years gone? How are you eight today? Tuesday, Blog Day, and a Birthday!

My son, you are eight, well not really until 3:21 this afternoon but close enough. As you eat mini Boston cream donuts for breakfast and tell me about your plans for eight. You have a lot of plans I might need a second coffee. You are a handsome young man who is going to change this world.

You are an old soul who is currently obsessed with Pavarotti the opera singer. Between listening to Pavarotti and friends album and Stompin Tom and how you can sing every word, oh goodness son you keep me laughing.

You asked to go on a trip to pay your respects to Stompin Tom when you found out he had passed away. You got cowboy boots that match his for Christmas and you are all set. Quick google search to find out his grave is here in Ontario. The first caddy cruise when she rolls out in the spring sounds like a fun time.

You are celebrating your birthday during Covid, in a lockdown, with online schooling happening. I never believed you should go to school on your birthday it’s the one day of the year that’s just your day! So today we eat mini donuts, we go to the local coffee shop, we go to the park with your dog, we do all the things you wanna do and we celebrate what an amazing kiddo you are.

I love that you have redone my life motto from “Do your best and if your best isn’t good enough fuck it!” to a kid-friendly version because you don’t wanna get in trouble for swearing at school. Your kid-friendly version that I adore has been changed to “Do your best and if your best isn’t good enough have fun with it!” When I asked you why you picked that you simply said being a kid is about having a lot of fun. I agree. I am a big kid so I think life is about having fun!

You started your own vision wall for your birthday and I love what you wrote. “Do your best job everyone and be nice”

You are one of the kindest kids I have ever known. Your ability to fit in anywhere always makes me smile. You always brighten someone’s day by talking to them. You honestly never stop talking. You have no fear of people. In your little home community, everyone seems to know you. You leave a mark everywhere you go.

Sometimes we struggle to get along. We have our moments just like everyone else does. But you kiddo are a strong believer you are right. Now I know how my parents felt when I was growing up. I too was always right.

With your daily love notes and that beautiful smile each and every day I am grateful, I am your mom. How did I get so lucky to be your mom?

2021

We survived 2020.

Shout out to you all! YaY!!

I smile behind my mask and celebrate from my home to yours. What a wild year it was. What a strange year it was. What a scary year it was. What a year of learning it was.

When I was a little kid I thought the year 2020 would have flying cars. It would be something like we used to watch in the Jetsons. It was nothing at all like back to the future promised. I never thought that this would be the year were masked and forced to stay away from other people and the things we love. 2020 you really made me think about my life. What do I want from 2021?

I feel like so many of you probably feel that 2020 came close to breaking us. I know I stand taller and stronger than ever. This will not break us. We will come together. You can look at the bad 2020 brought. Don’t get me wrong I see that too. But now as I often do in life, I also shine a light to all the amazing things 2020 taught us. It forced us to slow down. It forced us to look at our lives. It made us look at who is in our lives and what is important to us.

I was brought to tears surrounded by a community of people always reaching out to help other people. I felt and watched the kindness of complete strangers. I see more people outside enjoying nature than I ever have. I see a simpler kind of life. I will never understand what the toilet paper shortage was all about but I do get the panic and the fear of the unknown.

Going into 2021 I am so thankful that all of my family and close circle of people are healthy. Having your health you have everything. If I only had one wish going into 2021 it would be that we all remain healthy anything else can be fixed.

I have always had a dream of working from home. What’s not to love? I could get used to having my own brand of coffee, comfy pants, slippers, and a corgi dog to snuggle. That to me sounds like living the dream. I, however, do work at a local hospital doing paperwork which cannot be done from home so I have been wearing my mask for hours on end. It is a feeling I have struggled to get used to. Is it just me or do you all feel like you still have the mask on when you no longer have a mask on? I go to take my mask off all the time! I no longer want to go anywhere because you have to put the mask on. I do think that ripping the mask off is the equivalent of taking your bra off at the end of the day! When I can throw that mask down I feel like I have mastered the day! I am so very thankful for each and every breath of fresh air without my mask on.

I have had to have a Covid test that brought me to tears and for a moment I thought the nice lady performing the test reset my brain. I had the panic, the fear and the anxiety while waiting. I am thankful I remain healthy. I keep my circle as small as possible. My heart is full of love and I do my best to spread that to the world from my house to yours. My phone is always on. I am thankful for the power on the internet, for technology for the ability to keep in touch. For each and every time I see your faces on zoom chats. It is not the same as hugging you in person but I am thankful you take the time to chat.

2021 behind my mask I am smiling. My heart is filled with love. I am choosing to remain kind. I start each day with a positive thought and end each night with a grateful heart. I make a list every day of three to five things I am grateful for. I write these in a book that I can reflect upon. I recently found a book of things I was grateful for and a vision I had from 2011. I will write more on this in an upcoming blog. I love to look back and see how far I have come. I have so many people in my life I am thankful for. I am going to write blogs about a lot of people who have changed my life some know it some are about to find out. I have so many things I am grateful for. Find someone or something to be grateful for. Make a list. Let people know how much they mean to you.

Keep moving forward. Never give up. You have a huge heart. Give when you can and ask for help when you need it. Spread love and positivity and be kind we are all struggling to adjust to the new ways of the world.

Love notes

Nothing in the world warms my heart more than a card or a handwritten note. To see your handwriting and feelings expressed in the perfect card or note is the best gift in life. This instantly makes my day.

I keep a giant box filled with cards and letters. I have almost every card and letter given to me since I was a child. I cannot let these memories go. I am a hoarder of all things handwritten. I often pull this box of memories out and re-read some of the best memories shared via ink and paper. Having a bad day? Pick a card any card! I reach in this box of love notes and I am instantly cheered up.

I was born in the 80s and grew up in the 90s. Before the times of cell phones and texting that consumes so much of our time now. In a world of texting, I still prefer to talk on the phone to hear your voice to be consumed by the sounds of your life, but if given the option I would always take a handwritten version of your message. Something I can cherish forever. Don’t get me wrong I love technology and the ability to instantly talk to someone anywhere in the world but seeing the generic messages and the copy and pasted images of virtual cards just aren’t the same. Reading e-mails and text messages just doesn’t do it for me. I wanna hold the card. I wanna hold the letter. I wanna see the strokes of your penmanship. I wanna cherish your signature.

Finding the right card for someone that instantly sums up what you want to say or shows an image you know will make someone smile, laugh, or flood them with memories is the greatest feeling in life. The perfect card is winning the lotto to me. I spend a lot of time selecting the perfect card. I have thought about making my own line of cards. I am always on the hunt for corgi or flamingo cards.

I grew up writing to pen pals from all over the world. I grew up writing to my family who lived far away. I was forever rushing home from school shaking with excitement to check the mail. Getting mail when I was a kid was the best thing in the world. Ripping open the envelope and unfolding the origami-like folded delightful updates from my best friend who lived in the big city. I grew up in a small town and always dreamed of what it would be like to live where my letters came from. I got lost in the multi-coloured inked words you shared. I loved nothing more than to write you back. I lived for my letters and cards in the mail.

My first boyfriend was the king of love notes. He used to write me cute little notes and hide them in my work bag. This warmed my heart more than he will ever know. He always found cards that made me cry. When I forget what love feels like I re-read his cards.

When my son started school I started writing little post-it notes and hiding them in his lunch box. I wanted to remind him how much I loved him, how much I missed him when he was at school and secretly I wanted it to help him learn to read and write in a fun way. I started out drawing little pictures of his favourite things. I am sure his teacher thought they were pictures he drew. My art skills are that of a small child. I continued every day he was home with me. It became a fun little game I would distract him in the morning after I packed his lunch to sneak off and write a love note. He started to look forward to these notes. If I was rushed and forgot he was bummed. It became our cute little game. The more he learned to read the harder my post-it notes became. I wrote more challenging words he would have to sound out. I drew clues as to what the message was about. I loved writing him love notes.

I have a backpack I take to work and about a week ago I opened my bag and attached to my work bag was a love note my son wrote to me. I started to cry. He wrote me a love note and hid it in my bag. Now every day he’s home he hides a love note in my bag with a sweet message. I love his love notes.

It takes us just a quick moment each morning to remind each other with a cute note of how important we are. Write to someone you love a quick love note. Not all love notes have to be sappy. A simple have a great day on a post-it note in your handwriting can quickly change someone’s day. For example, I went to work one morning, having a morning. I struggle with sleep and sometimes mornings aren’t my finest time. I got assigned to work on a floor I love and they must have known I was coming the night before because upon the monitor from one of my favourite unit clerks Re-Angie was a post-it note that simply said: “Have a lovely day side two!” (side two is one of my many nicknames) I still have this Re-Angie post-it note in my badge holder. She didn’t know it then but this made my whole day better with her handwritten love note. On mornings when I am dragging my butt I pull this note out and my day is instantly great!

One small note can change someone’s whole day!

I love notes. I hoard all things handwritten.

If you would like to write me a card, letter or love note. I would love to write you back. I have included my address below. Please remember to include yours.

Sascha Davis
PO BOX 84
Bath Ontario Canada
K0H 1G0

December

This year has flown by for me. I cannot believe it’s already December, in a few short weeks we will be celebrating Christmas and then ringing in 2021.

December is a month of mixed emotions for me.

Ten years ago in December, I started my paper-pushing job at the local hospital. I started out not knowing anyone. I accepted a job on the top floor. My first ever shift alone was on Christmas and it was a hot mess of a day. I was left in tears and thinking this isn’t for me. I am not one to give up so I went back on boxing-day. I kept showing up and doing my best. I have become a part of a huge work family. I work with some of the best people I could have ever have imagined meeting in the last ten years. I have made some of the greatest friendships and found old friends. It’s been a wonderful ten years. I am blessed to be able to say I love my job. Here’s to another ten years in the making. Thanks, everyone!

Ten years ago in December, I lost my Oma (grandma). The holidays have never been the same since she passed. She always made the absolute best meals and desserts. You always ate like a member of the royal family. You had to wear stretchy pants to accommodate the endless dishes she just whipped up. She made this chestnut cream dessert that no one has ever recreated. My mouth is watering just thinking about it. Oma always knit the best and warmest sweaters, hats, scarves, mitts, and socks. She could just whip you up a new sweater while you watched a show. She made the most beautiful quilts by hand. I have so many wonderful purple quilts that I treasure every day. You were never allowed to buy her any gifts, yet she needed a transport truck to deliver your piles of goodies. You could get her a paper clip and she would have said it’s too much. I don’t need anything. I know she’s looking down on all of us this time of year and smiling. Not a holiday goes by that I don’t think I wish Oma was here. I can smell your turkey and taste your jam cookies. I would give anything to have one more Oma hug.

I am Canadian and I could not imagine December without snow. I have never lived anywhere that it doesn’t snow. I love the white blanket beauty of the snow, however, I don’t enjoy being cold. I am the girl who can be found with slipper booties, a heated blanket, and a cup of tea most of the winter months. I would like to be curled up watching the snow from inside. This year as I decorated my house in Christmas lights it was t-shirt weather that was a first for me. I could get used to that, but now as it’s December first, I am ready for the beauty of the Canadian winter.

As the holidays come closer I am getting excited. I know that this year will be different from all the other years as the pandemic still rages on and the area I live in is getting closer to another lockdown.

I am thankful that my friends and family are healthy and safe.

I am excited to haul in our real tree here shortly and get busy decorating. I am sad this is my first year without my Charlie dog, he loved the holidays. I am nervous this is my first year with the Kelsey dog. I pray she doesn’t pee on our tree. I know each and every year when I pull out the decorations I get all teary-eyed. I have decorations from my childhood. I have a stolen ornament of my brothers I refuse to give back! I have decorations made by many people I love. Every time I pull out the boxes to decorate I am flooded with so many memories made and memories I cannot wait to make. I have a box of holiday cards, yes, I keep every card I have ever been given. I love cards and the beautiful messages people have written. This fills my heart.

December is a month of mixed emotions for me as I miss so many people I wish I could hold tight. I am so lucky to have so many people still around me to love and spend time with. Treasure the people closest to you this holiday season. Stay safe. Stay healthy. Spread love, joy, and positivity!

Mind-reading

How cool would it be to have the ability to read minds? If I could have any superpower it would be the ability to read minds. Sign me up!

I admit I used to be the queen of bad communication. In my times of negativity, I could have been crowned one of the world’s worst communicators. Not the crown I want to wear.

Sadly I do not have the ability to read minds. However, I expected everyone to be able to read my mind.

In my transformation from a life riddled with negativity to a life glowing in positivity the first step I took was to reflect back on my life and what wasn’t working for me. I made a list of things to work on. I would say the biggest thing working against me was my communication skills, or should I say my lack of communication skills. I didn’t learn how to communicate. I learned how to shut down. When the going got tough in my life I shut down. I would run from my problems. Spoiler alert you can run but your problems will follow you. I didn’t want to face my problems or anything that upset me. I went silent. Another spoiler alert silence doesn’t solve your problems. Read my mind. I let my silence eat away at me. I didn’t know how to calmly communicate why I was upset. If you didn’t have the ability to read my mind you would have been lost, without a map, trying to figure out what I was upset about. I would remain upset for a long time without ever telling you why I was upset. Doesn’t that sound fun? I let myself get so worked up and so upset. I could feel myself seething with rage because you couldn’t figure out the exact moment your existence pissed me off. I know now why my relationships struggled. I struggled to communicate.

I wasted a lot of years stuck in negativity not communicating well. I remained silent and upset, never solving anything. Not communicating created more baggage for me to carry through life. I was exhausted. I was scared to tell you how I felt. I was scared to be judged and or rejected. My own self-communication was horribly negative. I only held on to the negativity. You could have said eight million nice things about me but that one time you said something slightly off I remembered that. I held onto that. My inability to communicate my feelings made me sick. Holding onto to so much anger I believe caused me a lot of health problems. In my years consumed by negativity, I had a lot of health problems. I didn’t look after myself. I wasn’t kind to myself. I drowned my negative feelings with my own dose of addictions. I am no doctor but I will tell you this also didn’t work well either.

I realize now very few people in this world can read minds. I was shocked to learn this! I am not a perfect communicator or an expert in anything just simply telling you about my transformation. Hoping to make someone’s life a little bit easier knowing they are not the only one in the world. We all have struggles. We all need help.

My communication ranged from simply not saying anything to losing my cool. From one extreme to the other. I missed the middle steps. What a horrible way to go through life. Silent or pissed off.

I am sorry for how I communicated with so many people over the years. I wish I would have taken the time to calm down, listen, and kindly reply. I have worked so hard to communicate in positive, kind ways. I changed the way I communicate with myself. I changed the way I communicate with others. Take time to listen. Take time to understand where other people are coming from. Take time to calm down and reply from a place of love, kindness, and positivity. Change starts with yourself. You have the ability to read your own mind. The only mind you can read is your own mind.

Reflect on what isn’t working in your life and find ways to change and make this life your best life!

Fall

I am sitting on my patio in my comfy over-sized bright teal hoodie from Tofino, warm lined leggings, and homemade knitted socks (Thanks for the socks mom). I have my steamy hot cup of coffee which is keeping my hands warm. I love my coffee with milk and maple syrup (don’t knock it until you try it). The sun is shining and I’m happy to still have my sunglasses on. From my patio, I am watching the leaves dancing in the cool fall wind. The leaves are slowly, yet gracefully making their way to the ground. I am smiling. This is fall. I often get my inspiration to write from my patio.

Yes, I am sad to see the warm summer days fading into the cool fall days, but the beauty of fall is something I will never get over. With every red tree, I see I fall more and more in love with this season. Truthfully I love something about each season. Canada is a beautiful place. I am thankful to live here.

From my patio, I have a gorgeous view of Lake Ontario. I do love where I live. This view of the lake is what sold me on this house. While looking at the water I apparently didn’t notice the large number of trees surrounding my property. I did not realize the amount of fall yard work I would be doing for the rest of my life. I do get a sense of joy even as an adult from raking leaves into piles and then jumping into them. I do my best to remember even as an adult to enjoy some child-like fun each and every day. Let go and be silly. Now as an adult I get the task of running the leaf blower-mulcher. I have a new game of how many bags of leaves will we have this year? Dragging those bags around the yard I am getting my work out in. Having fun and getting a workout in is a win win!

Fall is not only beautiful but it is also a time of great reflection. As I watch the leaves fall to the ground I am reminded of all the times I have fallen. I have failed so many times in life I have lost count. I could be negative and rant about my struggles but I choose to see the good. From each time I failed I learned a wonderful lesson. I have learned so many lessons in my life. I have also met a lot of wonderful people. Don’t be afraid to fall.

Sometimes I literally fell to the ground and wanted to give up. I think in life we all fall apart. We all fail at points in our lives. It’s how we build ourselves back up after a fall or failure that counts. You have the power to come back better than ever.
Every year the trees lose all of their leaves but they always make a beautiful comeback. Nature has a lot to teach us. Get outside and enjoy nature!

I remember the feeling of falling apart. I felt pain, sorrow, loneliness, defeat, anger, and the desire to no longer want to be a part of this world. I believe the biggest skill I had to work on to pick myself back up and become the fierce woman I am today is communication. The key to solving most problems is in the way we communicate. The way we use our words is very important. I used to use my words to react instantly. I reacted without a filter or care about how your feelings. I did not listen or understand where others were coming from. I only saw the negative. I was quick to react.

I am positive in my thirty-plus years I have hurt people with my words. I am sorry. I also carried around a lot of hurtful things other people said to me. My baggage of negative thoughts was heavy. Learn to let go of negative thoughts. You cannot take back your words once you have said them or typed them. Choose more positive and kind words to use.

In a world where we communicate mostly via typing, it is a great time to slow down and re-read your emails or text messages before hitting send. Often we don’t think about how someone could go back and re-read that message. Words hurt.

When I receive an e-mail or text message that I find upsetting I do not reply immediately. I have to take time to slow down and communicate from a calm and kind place. I often shut down the device I am on and take time to compose myself. There is no timeline on how fast you have to reply. I take time to think of how to reply calmly and kindly. Think about how nice the world would be if we all did that?

Fall is a wonderful time to reflect. What is something you could work on? Put on your comfy socks and join me. I would love to hear about your journey!